My body is doing weird things and I feel so out of it and I think it might be in my head but my hands feel like they're losing dexterity. Simon makes me feel unloved when he's away. I feel unworthy because of my mental health. He doesn't know what he's supposed to do to show he loves me. I don't want him to have to think of what he has to do to show me. I just want him to reach out to me and show me that he needs me in his life, despite the wonderful distractions of travelling through vietnam. Doesn't he miss me? Doesn't he wish I was there with him? Or is he just relieved to not have to think about me and be able to just have fun? Maybe. I guess that's not the hallmark of a great partner.